Whole?

     In my sessions with G, two of the conflicts at the root of the tree which is me seem to have been totally resolved and eliminated. The original baby was not only drawn Moses-like from the hidden place of safety but next thing I knew she was a little girl walking down a runway.
     We got in touch with lies that split me at my core and God spoke truth to them and things inside adjusted. But I'm not sure what. I can't seem to get in touch with some of the "little ones" who used to feel separate.  It just feels like they are part of me now, that I like certain things April and Jess liked.
     Does that mean I am partially integrated? Even whole?
     Maybe not whole. I still sense some barriers, some compartments I haven't explored yet.
     But I'm not in touch with anyone inside right now, haven't been for weeks, so I don't know what's going on. Whoever is there has retreated way to the back of the brain, into the bunker, probably because above ground we are under heavy mortar and missile attack from the elder board of our church. They sent out an e-mail to everyone in our church telling them not to speak to us (this includes my husband and a handful of others) or to read anything we write. We see some people shrinking away from us with fear in their eyes. Elders' wives avoid us; one tosses her head whenever we approach, turning as if to speak to someone behind her when there is no one there. (I tried to be reconciled with her but she berated me for the things I said about her husband and then walked away. Why? He was the one who hurt me. "You said he yelled at you!" "I didn't say that. He didn't yell at me." "Well, but you said other things.")
     We're bruised but not destroyed. God keeps sustaining us and giving us love for them. And some have responded in kind and are even in agreement with us.
     A wonderful thing happened. The elders declared a day of prayer and fasting, asking prayer for themselves. They may have intended it for evil, to rally indignant troops to pray against us. But we prayed too. We prayed for them and we called each one to tell him so, thank him for declaring the day of prayer, asking him how we could be praying for him. And 13 of the 30 men entrusted prayer requests to us! We felt privileged to take them to the Most High God in the name of Jesus Christ.
     We also prayed against the enchantment that holds them fast in "emergence," for freedom from the cult.