Steve or Jay? (or Jess?)

 

                                       


Today was Steve's turn. He's pretty straightforward and easy-going, has lots of interests, some of which surprised me because I didn't see them as interests of mine. For example, his favorite color is brown, any shade of brown. (Brown!) 
     He likes horses and horse-riding and he likes cowboys, including their clothes, boots, leather saddlebags, lassos, barbecues, campfires, the whole shooting match, with the exception of spurs and aspects of the macho image--all the sorts of things I associate with discomfort, dust, heat and dry, barren hills. He likes brown hills, chaparral, sage, manzanita--and sunsets from those brown hills. He doesn't mind dust, sweat, or mess. He's all about getting the job done, having a mission or assignment and, preferably with other men, accomplishing it.
     The mission can be a round-up--or saving a damsel in distress from imprisonment in a castle. Therefore he also likes:
     --medieval times, pennants, jousting, castles, crenelations, turrets, parapets, knights, drawbridges, King Arthur, and chivalry.
     --war documentaries, knives, muskets. He liked the Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe and Johnny Tremain--but he also likes Ferdinand the Bull.
     --photography, especially on safari or as a war correspondent.
     He likes architecture (great halls with tall windows, lily ponds) and gardens (English or stylized).
     Steve is looking forward to the trip to Ireland, both because of the C.S. Lewis element and the fact that we will be on a tall ship. He likes boats, various kinds of wood, and he loved Dad (Skipper)'s "tree house" in the redwoods.
     I asked him if he had been created by trauma. He says he thinks he was less created than conformed and not by trauma but by expectations: "Dad treated me like a boy. That's who he wanted me to be. ___ was a rebel and ____  (my brothers) was too passive. I was his 'right-hand man.'"
     Does he have any homosexual leanings? "No, I'm only interested in men as buddies, partners, comrades. I could do a mission by myself, say, run a lighthouse but I prefer being with the other guys, sitting on rocks or the ground, eating beans around a campfire."
     How does he feel about Dad's treatment of his "sisters" (other alters). "I feel bad for them."
     He's all about loyalty and good-over-evil.

Written July 24, 2007